Steve
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“I want to lead, but not like my boss.”
Some lessons are just no fun to learn. Having a bad boss is one of those lessons. Through no fault of your own, you’re overlooked, neglected, belittled, or maybe even set up for failure. Depending on your situation, escape may be the right option. If your physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual health is in danger,…
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Most decisions aren’t right vs. wrong
As a leader, you’ll often face choices where there is no clear right or wrong answer, no obvious best or worst option. We call these dilemmas. And not all dilemmas are the same. The best kind of dilemma is when you have multiple good options, and you want to choose the one that’s the most…
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Silly Symbols Save Sanity
Nearly twenty years ago, I found myself suddenly and unexpectedly working from home, with no room in the house suitable to turn into an office. After yet another acquisition and the downsizing that followed, very few people were left in our regional office, and the company decided to temporarily close it, and have us experiment…
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Don’t chase consistency; pursue faithfulness
You know the stereotyped volatile leader. One day they’re all smiles, and no matter how much you mess up, it’s no big deal. The next day the slightest slip-up draws a tirade loaded with expletives. And you think to yourself, “I just wish they were consistent.” As you try to learn from other people’s mistakes,…
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Changing companies has a hidden trap
When you take a better offer at another company, it’s easy to think that things will be better for you after the transition. I mean, that other company offered you a better salary, or a larger scope of influence, or a better title, or something better than your old job had. Why would they lure…
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Dealing with difficult people
The bad boss. The competitive colleague. The toxic genius. They make life difficult for you and others. But what can you do about them? Especially if you have no formal leadership position in your organization? First, let me be clear that I’m talking about the more common people who are annoying or flawed, not the…
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Should I become a manager?
I bristle when I hear of a software engineering organization pressuring their top engineers to become managers. Managing and engineering are completely different skill sets – different enough that those who excel at one tend to struggle at the other. But what if you’re an individual contributor, and you see that there may be a…
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Nail the Stretch Assignment Without Sacrificing Family
They finally recognized your potential at work, and you have the chance to do something new. Something you haven’t done before. Something that comes with a real risk of failure. This is one of those growth opportunities that can make or break your career. Or your family. But here are two practices that will come…
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Emotional Intelligence for Non-Managers
Someone told me recently, “I don’t want to go into management, because I’m not good at dealing with people problems.” Becoming a manager is a complete career change, so I’m not about to pressure anyone into management. But I do encourage people to explore that self-limiting identity that says, “I’m not good at dealing with…
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Say “no” to the wrong promotion
Twice in my career, I surprised my senior leaders by declining very direct offers for promotions. Did I want more respect? more status? more income? Sure, I did! But I wanted something else even more. And maybe you do, too. In one case, accepting the promotion would have meant moving to a different state. And…
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Embrace ideological conflict
“Hey, let’s take this conversation offline,” you say. Sometimes, that means, “This sounds like an interpersonal problem that you two (or we two) need to resolve separately.” Sometimes it means, “That challenge only affects your teams, so solve it yourself without taking up time for the rest of us.” And sometimes it means, “This conversation…
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What detail should I give to senior leaders?
An I.T. Director shared with me recently that they’ve been halted in meetings with senior leaders because they’re explaining too many details that don’t matter to the person they’re talking to. And even if you’re not being actively silenced, you may be hurting your influence when your listeners find your talking points irrelevant to them.…