As an engineer adapting to management responsibilities, it’s common to feel like you’re not yet the person your role expects you to be. I know how stressful it can be to feel like you’re getting it wrong.
At the same time, you also recognize that your company chose you for this role. There was – and is – something special about you, but leaning too far into that thought can alienate people.
You don’t want to fall to impostor syndrome, and your team needs to see that you’re confident in leading them. But you also know that they’ll resist arrogance.
How do you develop the confidence that you want while avoiding the arrogance that you don’t want? And how can you tell which one you’re living out when it seems they can look so similar?
First, look at what comparison you’re making. Arrogance comes from a feeling of superiority when comparing against other people. Confidence comes from a demonstration of capability when comparing against a standard or expectation.
Second, look at how you measure or demonstrate your value. Arrogance draws on title or position and expects compliance. It discounts corrective feedback, sometimes considering it “noise” or even “resistance.” Confidence comes from keeping small commitments and then building on them. It acknowledges uncertainty, welcomes feedback, with both a willingness to act on incomplete information and a readiness to repair mistakes and constantly improve.
If you’d like to build skills and habits that will give you confidence without arrogance as a manager of engineers, let’s talk. Visit stevedwire.com/talk to start the conversation.
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