Executive coaches and leadership coaches like me can sometimes do more harm than good. Today I want to share one way that we can do that, so you can know how to thrive even if your coach makes a mistake like this.
Part of what makes a helpful coach is their unwavering belief that you are an intelligent, competent, and capable person. Part of what makes an effective coach is their willingness to invite you to re-examine some of your long-held beliefs to see if they’re still true and still serving you.
So when you describe what you believe to be a personal limitation, a good coach may invite you to reconsider whether that limitation is real. Another coach may simply ask whether your belief in that limitation serves you.
I can recall two different coaching conversations in which a coach challenged a client’s belief that they were unskilled in a certain area. When the client repeated their need to acknowledge their current limitation in order to make realistic plans, the coach asked, “Why do you keep fighting for your limitations?”
Some people seem to behave as if “limiting beliefs” and “false beliefs” were the same thing. They reject all apparent negative energy.
But often, the first step in overcoming your limitations is to acknowledge and confront them. Being honest is crucial in helping you devise a plan to grow. The second step is to recognize that your current limitations don’t define you. “Fighting for your limitations” is attaching yourself to the idea that they will be with you forever. Don’t do that.
If someone you know could use some help in identifying and overcoming their current limitations, invite them to schedule a complimentary conversation with me at stevedwire.com/talk.
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